Well... I'm feeling a little worn out right now, it's been a very long day. But thought I would take a little time to write this post, as it feels good to sit down and have a little 'me' time.
It was lovely to get to sleep until 7:15am this morning but then Rose dropped her mid-morning nap and during the whole day she only slept about 30 minutes worth altogether.. it was so frustrating, she kept falling asleep but then shortly after, she's wake again. We had some of Ray's family visiting, so I thought that maybe she had just had too much stimulation and that's why she wasn't settling.. but usually she's fine and pretty much sticks to her routine. I tried her with calpol and teething gel, in case it was teething but she still wouldn't sleep. So obviously she was so over-tired by the end of the day that it was then really hard to get her down for the night.. I've got myself in a bit of a pickle really because I've been so soft and have gone for the easy option of breastfeeding her until she falls asleep and then VERY carefully transferring her into her cot... this sometimes doesn't work and then I end up feeding her for a little longer until she falls asleep again. This can sometimes go on for a while.. what I Really should have done by now is get her used to falling asleep by herself in her cot. I should let her cry for a short amount of time, instead of just going straight in to sooth her... maybe I'm just too soft.
Anyone have any advice?! Or did/does anyone else have the same problems... even if it's just to make me feel a little better about my mothering skills..!
Right! Onto other things... Since the embroidery that I was working on for my Nan's birthday went a little wrong, I decided to do something different for her gift. It was a pattern from the 'Cute and Easy Crochet' book, but it was printed in the June 2011 issue of Country Homes and Interiors. I thought I could make the flower purse for her and she could use it for a number of different things.. plus when I'm crocheting it feels like there's a faster result, rather than embroidery which seems to take foreverrr! Not that I ind spending the time on it, just not when I have a deadline to get it done by.
Here are some pics of it as a WIP:
Once I had sewn in the lining for the purse and sewn the sides together..
Then here it is finished! Button hole sewn... button sewn on.... flowers positioned and attached.
I quite like it..! :-)
But it Is a gift.. and I have to give it away, but it's going to a lovely home..!
I also bought a Dahlia plant for her as I know she loves them.. and just in case she doesn't like my homemade gift too much, she can enjoy looking at these pretty flowers..
Okay, I have to go bed now.. just in case the little madam wakes up again!
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Firstly there is NOTHING wrong with your mothering skills. We all do it Ash, until...... we change out routine, because it is what we choose to do rather then we are told to do it. Is is fine to change Rose's routine now and see how it goes, do the same as you did in the day time with her naps, a bit at a time and she will soon get used to a different night time routine. You are a fantastic Mum< and should be very prod how you have so far raised your beautiful daughter.
ReplyDeleteNan's Birthday gift is lovely, she'll love it.
Which book is that? sounds like the one I was looking at in Waterstone's the other day but resisted (as I thought you'd have it and I could borrow it actually xx)
Yep< that i the book. May I have a look next time you're down? Will post up your new one xx
ReplyDeleteGO TO BED!!!!
Ash, I did the same thing with my first born, then it sort of slips by the wayside when the next one comes along, because you just don't have the time and the next one just seems to be easier in that respect. Most importanly you are giving your gorgeous Rose lots of love, so go you. Love your Nan's little purse and dahlia, very pretty color. I have that book, must make one of the purses, they are very sweet. Love your lining.
ReplyDeletex Sandi
I think the purse is beautiful and I love the colours. You have done a great job.
ReplyDeleteI think us Mums feel guilty sometimes when we are doing a good job. I have sung my daughter to sleep, cuddled her to sleep and let her sleep with me when she wakes in the night crying. Only recently have I put her to sleep in the cot to fall asleep on her own!
I would say do what feels right for you. I was in a children's home when I was a baby and I think noone ever can have too much love. I think what you are doing now is fab. You sound very caring and loving and you only need to change things if it would work better for you. We are told so many different things by books and 'experts' but you know best as her mummy.
Tracy
I can't give you any advice even though I have 3 children and none were "good" sleepers. I have tried every trick in the book. In the end I had to leave them to cry it out. I was exhausted. I remember the night I left Little (then 10 monhs) in a cot in the playroom at 11pm and I then went to bed and set my alarm for 6am. I was terrified I'd find a snotty, hiccuping, hysterical baby when I woke. But he slept for a further hour and woke up smiling at me. I've no idea if he sobbed all night long. I just know I needed to get some sleep. I know I'll need to do the same with Mini soon, but I'm not quite brave enough and haven't tried every trick yet.
ReplyDeleteBut good luck to you, it's all about surviving the day with little 'uns. Do what you are comfortable with, you'll only feel upset otherwise. She's your baby, trust your instincts x x x
ps Gorgeous crochet!
ReplyDeleteHi - I saw your link on Crochet with Raymond and popped in to say hello. I'm in West Sussex too :)
ReplyDeleteCute crochet!
As far as babies are concerned, I wouldn't normally comment and wouldn't ever criticise what someone else does or try to force my opinion on someone, but as you asked for input I'll say this. I strongly believe that a happy baby makes a happy mum and vice versa. I don't know who decided a baby "should" be able to sleep alone at a certain point on a calendar - I just know that she will... one day... when SHE is ready. I feel that the the prevalent "should" culture places a lot of unfair pressure on parents (esp first time) and in turn on babies and is makes people deny their natural instincts, which is actually what makes them feel 'bad', unhappy or stressed out.
Trust yourself - listen to your heart. Please don't feel you ever have to apologise for how you choose to do that - have faith in yourself - you are the perfect mother for your little one. Feeding your baby to sleep is the most natural, wonderful, comforting thing you could do for her if that is what she needs. Being there for her when she needs you, allowing her to spend her energy on growing and developing and not worrying where she is or you are. She won't want you to be there forever.
Enjoy your baby. She'll be grown before you know it and you'll look back on these wonderful moments and wish you could have them back for even a second longer. I don't think you've been "soft" and breastfeeding isn't the "easy option" - you are simply doing what BILLIONS of loving mothers have done and will do - because it's what's natural. Do what you feel is right for you and your baby. (And don't worry what anyone else thinks!)
Wishing you a restful evening.
xxxx
I can't give you any advice from experience of mothering because I don't have children but what I can say is all of my friends have children, as does my sis, and not one of them does the same thing as each other. They all have their own ways that they've settled into and that are right for them. I think you have a beautiful baby, she always looks very happy and you will do what's right for you. Which means it will be right for Rose. Try not to worry about what you 'should' be doing. And if all else fails, I reckon a drop of whisky. For both of you ;-)
ReplyDeleteLove the crochet, it's fab. So you embroider too? I have a question for you... There was a pretty embroidery pattern in Mollie Makes this month. I did embroidery when I was a child but the fabric already had the pattern on it... What's the best way to get the pattern onto the fabric to copy? Trace with a fabric pen? I'd love to have a go at embroidery again.
Nicki xx
I reckon everyone does their fair share of things they know are probably(?) not the way to go but you sort of fall into them - I rock Mabel to sleep in her pram every day, sometimes it takes me ages and I do think, "what the hell am I doing" but then continue anyway!!
ReplyDeleteThere is something in it about babies being 'ready' I think. I tried to get her to fall asleep in her cot on her own for ages and she was having none of it. Then suddenly she seemed to reach a stage where she was o.k, I wished I hadn't given myself such a headache about it at the time. So my advice (though I do agree with the other comments that there is no such thing as a 'right way', every baby is different and you are in no way a bad mother. oh and also I am probably in no place to give out such advice since I am honestly 'played' by our 5 month old daily) would be to try again in a week or so just to put her down when semi asleep but not over tired and she might surprise you. Sometimes Mabel will stay awake 'babbling' for up to half an hour and I almost nightly go up with the guilt I have abandoned her for so long but actually I think she does just like some quiet time? And if it doesn't work, don't give yourself a hard time, just go with whatever you need to do to get her to sleep happy and you downstairs with a glass of wine! And just think, at least your not spending up to an hour a day pushing a pram back and forwards in a kitchen!
Sorry long comment there,
Nelly xxx